


The Party tree love

by ScotCoyjedii



Series: Hobbiton x Dwarves [2]
Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Ninjas, BAMF Bilbo Baggins, F/M, Fry pan violence, Grumpy Thorin, Party Tree, Stalker Lotho, always a girl bilbo, angsty, gets a taste of his own medicine, its a classy way to go, peeper Lotho, referance to self harming, sort of only Bilbo!ninja
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-16
Updated: 2015-03-16
Packaged: 2018-03-18 03:11:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3553886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScotCoyjedii/pseuds/ScotCoyjedii
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bella "Bilba" Baggins II wasn't expecting so many guests but she was <em> always </em> prepared.<br/>She ends up paying visit to a guy whos a real jerkface with a majestic mane.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Party tree love

**Author's Note:**

> yes, I went their I got bored. Lotho is a jerkface a bigger one than anyone else except maybe Saruman the White. That guy just is a smug snake I liked Smaug better than him. Course he's probably the only dragon you wouldn't mind having the hots for just because of Benedict Cumberbach, okay now I just sound weird but that's okay.  
> Edit:  
> Sometimes I'll go to omnipotent narrator mode the main point of view is still Bella.
> 
> If you think I'm giving out too much just feel free to yell at me.

She met Mister Gandalf the Grey earlier that day, he was well known for his wisdom and great fireworks in the Shire. I think he was pretty well known and well liked by pretty much everyone don't quote me on that though. Evil doesn't count I believe he's here to fight evil or something like that, no not here in the Shire, here as in Middle Earth or is it on Middle Earth? 

She was going out to the market to get some things turns out that she needed a lot of things. Eventually she made it back to Bag End later by Dinner ,after she dropped off groceries put them in their place. The pantries or the spice cabinet's she had plenty of room its just that she was having a forgetful day, by the time she was done with that she forgot that she was late. Lobelia and tea over her son's behavior ,Lobelia for the moment was in denial that her son would do something like that.  


All in all she had a miserable day. Though she wouldn't tell anyone that personally, she would deny it first before anything that _looked or sounded_ like the truth came out. She dragged her feet back to Bag End down Bag Shot Row.  


Ignoring the details of the moment including the slightly glowing blue symbol on her green door. Her mind was in neutral by then so few Hobbit's knew Lobelia's powers! The Hobbit herself was as stubborn as a mule and known for being a stickler for propriety. One that her _son_ refused to conform to and the result? A shouting match between the two adult women ,nether side willing to give in to the other's words. Lobelia might be a few years older or more but she could beat a Took in stubbornness. 

The emotional exhaustion caused by it was enough to make anyone revert to a native tongue or a native dialect (which is the same thing). 

By this time she was mentally exhausted reverting once again  to Hobbitish. She barely made dinner without trying to fall asleep or nearly burning herself, so she made a pot of the raspberry tea. It helped her stay awake for the moment it seems everything came into focus as a fog was lifted from her mind. The local market knew that she like her father Bungo loved new types of teas, flavored preferably as she had got many new types from the market.

Some which she liked, others that she didn't, and others _still_ she didn't have any preference over. It t'was fortunate that she had so many relatives of whom she could give the tea's she knew they liked, but she herself didn't. Finishing her cup of tea getting to work to fishing her dinner which was easy afterwards. No burns, no falling asleep nothing wrong at all! At least she hoped all was well, but nothing is what it seems. 

She had a feeling that one day someone was going to ask her to come out of retirement to help that said persons goals, whatever they may be, and put him in a position of greater power. She blanched at the thought.  


_I went into retirement for a very good reason! To keep everyone guessing and to ensure that I didn't get daily fricking contracts to kill someone. I mean come on! Do I look like I am assassin? There is a difference between a ninja and an assassin! A big one. Some people don't know the difference.Navy blue blends in better with the darkness than actual black does yet people think ninjas wear all black? Half the time we look like ordinary people blending in with the crowd. The weapons are often not meant to last a century and usually makeshift._

I shook my head to clear it of my internal banter. My inner ninja was howling in rage again. I smiled at the foolishness of it. Why should I feel this way? They are just having fun like fauntlings should, very young fauntlings playing dress up more precisely as ninjas. The world isn't perfect in its views of legendary enlistments of ninjas.  
The door got a loud series of knocks I wasn't expecting company nor was I dressed for it, I internally panicked.

  


"Just a minute!!!" I shouted hastily running off into my room. Closing the door behind me, I bit my lip wondering if I should lock it. In a split decision I did indeed lock the door 'better safe than sorry' as the old saying goes. I needed something more appropriate for the occasion and I didn't have all frickin' night!  
_Confounded wizard! If I wasn't a nice person I would box his ears for pulling a fast one on me!_ I growled at the very thought.  
I quickly headed over to the dresser opening it's confines trying to pick some proper lady clothes to put on. No time for a corset- (I needed time to lace it up time I predicted I didn't have) the bra will have to do, the dress was a light sky blue, a gift from one of my *ehm* former suitors. Long story. I inwardly cringed at the memory, _I'll take Lotho any day than have to relive through that experience again._ I thought grumbling inside my head. I admit to picking out the first dress I got my hands on, of that I am guilty of including in many Hobbit's eyes a classic example of a Took trying to conform. It just doesn't happen or even work well at all after all people can smell fake a mile away. I hurt to say it but I am a perfect example of what they see me as: an enigma in the Shire.  
Putting it painfully aside for a later date, I headed for the door the knocks were inpatient. It sounded to me like he was going to break the door with all that banging. I managed to get to the door only to see a dwarf I had never met.

"For a moment I thought you might be my cousin Lobelia to tear me another earful... come in, " I really hadn't thought that I thought it might have been someone else. Likely another human who wanted their lover dead for their infidelity towards their marriage. One I always got sick of I told them to get some mental help and talk it out instead of doing something stupid they'll later regret. Don't really want to think about it if or if not they followed my advice at all. I don't need anymore problems that I already have.  


"Dwalin at your service."

"Belladonna Baggins the second at ...yours." I tried to lift the hammer he gave me with little effort. _These dwarves they must be strong! To lift *pant* this heavy thing!_ I thought grinding my teeth. Getting no where fast he held it and I barely managed to put in the corner. He munched on my dinner I didn't mind really, I really needed someone to talk to other than my neighbors and a shouting match with Lobelia. I grinned internally at that. 

"The second who was the first?" Balin joked when we were introduced proper. He was a kinder looking Dwarf you couldn't get mad at him he just looked like a grandfather type figure. I prepared myself by getting lot of my dishes out, just in case.

"My mother," I shouted from the main kitchen. Preparing everything else in my pantry as I had a feeling that I was in for a long treat. I always kept my hair back while cooking in a fishtail braid anyway. I was going to cook it all some time at least putting on an apron before I started to cook.

"Are your parent's here kid?" Balin asked. He came into the kitchen just as I put the tarts in setting the timer for just the right time. A cute cat timer that meowed loudly when it went off.

"I am thirty four that is of legal age in the Shire! I know you dwarves live long lives, but we only live to hundred if we are _that_ lucky, we will live well past that without losing ourselves along the way." I thought of my mother she died at eighty one I think a year and a half apart from my father. It seemed too long ago for me even though it was only a year ago. She died on my name day which made it all the worse for the wear. My mother started to suffer from a degenerative disease that took away her mind piece by piece, bit by bit. It was hard on everyone in the Shire all the adults pretty much knew her on some level to watch her die like that, was brutal to know. She lost all of her minds memories even all those times that she saved the Rangers lives, more than once did she save them. In the end their was no cure for it, no one can save you when you have that because its too late to be saved at all. It was gut wrenching even now. 

"That would be the rest of the Company I guess."

I opened the door and there was a handsome blonde with mustache braids who would have many hobbit women swooning over him the brunette oh my god he was so very hot he would make Lobelia swoon and _**she was married!**_

"Fili,"

"And Kili,"

"At your service." the two said in unison bowing.

"Bella Baggins at yours."

"Wait your a girl?" Kili asked he hadn't bothered to look down at what I wore.

"Woman actually same difference," I said bored already. They were good looking though I'll give them that.

"I don't think Uncle will be happy about being lied to." Fili said.

"Come in or the food will be gone before you know it." I teased. 

"Okay..."they both walked in she scolded Kili for defiling her mothers glory box , her mother would have laughed at sentimentality if she hadn't had a bad heart (and lost her mind),  and got a bunch of weapons dumped into her arms by Fili.

"Are you sure this is the right place...?"Kili muttered to his brother, as she set them down before going to get them served.  

"Unless your looking for my long lost brother who left the Shire and never came back then yes your at the right place..." she set down a plate not just one or two, but she had the entire table laden in plates and cockery of foods of all kinds, gravy's, and all sorts of appetizers.  

"You have a brother?"Balin asked curious. 

"Twins." I hummed.

"What happened?"Kili asked her. 

"No idea. On our twenty seventh birthday he was betrothed to Lobelia and ran when he found out." I smiled at their reactions dumbfounded and jaws dropped. They never met Lobelia so help me they never would! I would spare them that torment. How overly dramatic of me to think such thoughts. "He had the right idea that he was going to be married to her when he turned thirty three, he's alive I know that much." I laughed again at their befuddled and taken aback reactions.

"Betrothal isn't practiced anymore by dwarrow you must understand that the rest of us are just surprised. That such creatures as yourselves would practice such a thing." Dwalin explained unnerved by her statement like it wasn't anything important. It unnerved him because the way she said it like she wasn't worried the same would happen to her.

"Its uncommon and not well liked by many. So it wasn't frowned on when he left he had every reason to Lobelia is a terror in itself stubborn and ...eh a bit of a thief. She's known to steal my silverware every time she comes over."I tried to put him at ease I don't think it was working.

"Your still young are you married?" Gloin asked stroking his beard thoughtfully he likely didn't have a clue about hobbit culture. I didn't mind we hobbits didn't mind its not like our greatest hardwood works get around without the master craftshobbit asking for a payment in a party format. It wasn't something you paid in material coin or objects to get professional labor you had to throw a great party that either improved their mood currently or amused them or the like. The finest work was made from hardwood (some races didn't care for it) after all we capitalized on it we had tree farms so we wouldn't have to kill the original specimens of trees in the forest. After all those trees have been here and can live at least a hundred years or more (pine trees didn't have a exceptionally long life span due to their roots being shallow) though this didn't determine how long they would live did it? 

Few did know of our species exceptional skill with hardwood I had the finest pieces in hobbiton by old Bolger right before he retired at sixty seven being a widower he likely was possibly crushed by this but continued on in her memory, he died at the ripe age of 98. Not that any of these dwarves cared about that neither did I as he died long before I was born or even thought of. My fathers parent's had thrown the party old Bolger was asking for as a payment for his services, a Baggins like any self respecting hobbit knew how to organize and throw the best party ever. They succeeded and thus he accepted the commission request.

"No." I stated I had no emotion in the way I said it because simply I didn't care for any male hobbit in that way. That made Fili choke on something and Kili do a spit take. The chaos how I do enjoy this, a smug grin on my face somehow betraying my emotions.

"Why ever not?" Nori asked his bows furrowed in confusion. She surely had gotten at least some courting gifts she was pleasing to the eye, Nori had to resist the urge to lick his dry lips. She was possibly the most bountiful woman he'd ever met the curves added to it as well. Dwarf women didn't have the same look to her body yes curves were minimal at best (noticeable outside of armor I mean) and few had the same curvaceous body. Those that did well they had mental issues because of constant rejection they were preferred by honest men or elves on occasion, those were the ones marrying outside our own race not all but a good deal did. Dwarves were a strange folk they were carved from stone by their creator Mahal they were built sturdy --- 

"Most of my potential suitors aren't my type, the dating part makes it harder than it looks. I get a bunch of creeps more often than not who are a bit unhinged and are trolls. Most of my Tookish cousins are nicer than them any how."I answered snapping Nori from his thoughts then it struck him _he had been staring at her the entire time drinking in her beauty like a sick pedophile_. He quickly turned his head away hiding his intense embarrassment barely remaining seated as he let his right hand nails dig deeply into his knee even if he was wearing pants. A sick feeling of shame rose like a dark haze settling like a ball of ice and fire in his stomach. 

Bella never noticed that Nori was looking at her long she herself probably couldn't bring herself to care if she did notice. She likely hadn't got enough attention from guys who _actually_ liked her for something other than her beauty and inheritance. She didn't notice that he turned his head away red faced gaining a strange look from Dori being shot towards his younger brother. She was oblivious to all this even if she was in the center of it.

That was true I hated most if not all of my potential suitors I saw marriage as something of a stupid pressure placed upon women 'to protect them' by society. Stupid society unwritten rules I could agree with some but others I couldn't, marriage to another hobbit wasn't something I could imagine in my life time I found Hobbit men were too- _soft_ and not muscular as a dwarf was. I had more refined tastes than half og my relatives. If I could marry a Took I would but alas I cannot. First cousins marital bonds could cause problems both in the Shire and in the children. 

I've seen it happen and nothing good came of it after all it was arranged between a Burrows and a Chubb. It led to the Burrows being abused housewife with thirteen children to feed and take care of, with an angry alcoholic of a husband. First cousins they were don't ask me how. I only knew that during a marital fight a really bad one she ran him through with a sword, she had it commissioned from a blacksmith in Bree a month prior to this I heard. I was a tween when that happened. Life in the Shire isn't always as it seems and murder does happen. Unfortunately. 

"How can you know? About your brother I mean." Kili asked me changing the subject. Smart boy.

"It's a twin thing, I know when he's hurt even if he's miles away." I said. That was the truth of it my brother and I were always close.

The door bell rang and I headed to the door getting a dwarf pile on my floor a meek Gandalf looking into my home outside. I said nothing to him in point of fact I flat out ignored him. I was seething inside and it was almost ready to break out. If you could tell from my clenched fist's where the knuckles were bone white.

"Mom always said the way to a man's heart was through his stomach, can you stop ogling me like you've never seen a female before? Its unnerving." She said Gloín got baffed over the head by Bifur. She liked Bifur already even if she couldn't understand him.

"What do you want to drink I have a lot of alcohol left over from my birthday party last year..." That I didn't like. I refused to show how I felt in my voice or in my face. My eyes still glazed over. Bofur took notice as did Oin but said nothing about it. 

"You got any beer?" Dwalin asked.

"Depends on what kind of beer you want?" I shifted from my one foot to the other idly. Trying my best to hide my own awkward nervousness. I didn't get anything to eat either likely didn't do anything for me. 

"Just beer."Dwalin stated, his brows furrowed. Despite his bald head and tattoos upon it he seemed nice enough, he struck me as a warrior or a guard captain of some sort. I found his confusion amusing though I kept my amusement to myself. Knowing full well that he could snap me in half if he had half a mind to do so. 

"Okay." How boring. I was hoping for a little bit more adventurous in alcohol dwarrows but I guess that's asking for much. I know they drink but not all of them are habitual alcoholics. At least I hoped that was the case and none of them were so called "angry drunks", I cringed. _That could get ugly fast, ex-suitor was one of those...as you can guess. It didn't end well. It began and ended as it began swift yet unrelenting as a gale force wind, all within a two month period. That was one of the shortest relationships I have ever been in. I don't want another angry drunk in my smial ever again, if one of these dwarves proves to be one I'll throw him out. At least I'll try to throw him out I might not succeed. It never does end well for my own social life it seems, any relationship between someone else and I some how some way will sour. Its not easy dealing with it, the shock waves caused in the aftermath and the social destruction of whatever remained of my self esteem. I should be used to it by now, let me tell you that you_ NEVER _get used to it._  


"Something wrong?"

"This is going to sound weird but which one of you is a alcoholic?"

"What ever do you mean?" Balin asked. I face palmed _DO these dwarves eve HAVE a concept called an "angry drunk"? !! I screamed inside my personal mind prison for my ninja, for once I agreed with the sentiment._

"Do you _know_ how infuriating this is?!!" I finally snapped.

"If I get another contract to kill anything stupid or over something stupid I swear I'll be the one to kill them!" I snarled. Not realizing how scary I _might_ have looked. Dwalin cowered.

"Idiotic humans come to me over stupid marital infidelity requesting me to kill the partner." I sneered. Balin gulped at that.

"WHICH ONE OF you is the angry drunk because if their is one among you I'll kick you out of this house myself." I snarled. 

"None mistress." Nori squeaked. Nori never squeaked not even when he was caught by Dwalin in Eren Luin stealing or elsewhere. NEVER. Something in him just broke down when he saw this hobbit, no not just that a _halfling_ talk like that made his resolve break like a twig being broken in two. Ori gave his half brother a weird look and Dori did the same no one laughed. In fact the room was silent. 

She went over and got many flaggons of beer on a serving tray, setting them down next to the dwarf who "ordered" it. Much to their surprise that she was so honest about having beer most _humans_ wouldn't have even bothered, if they weren't being paid.

There was a cry she recognized above the jovial sounds of the party within her home more precisely _outside_ her house, her ears flicked she recognized her aunts cry's. She had been having the terrible nightmares again.

A frantic knock came at the door, silencing them all. They probably thought it was their leader who ever he was, I ran to the door knowing that she would be at the door with bloody arms again, Lobelia was worried deeply about her in laws relative. She did have a heart at least. Rightly so, as I was worried that my dear aunt might end up killing herself that way.

  "Auntie, what have you done? Again?"

A soft sob came from her lips those eyes ...they weren't here in the moment they were back there during the Fell Winter. I dragged her inside as she obviously couldn't tell reality from the past. You are reliving it over and over again. Like a personal torture chamber made up of memories.

"I'll have to tell Lobelia next time this happens..." I warned her.

"Lobelia doesn't care." The voice was dead and flat lined.

"She's worried and rumors fly like crazy. She's afraid  that next time will be the _last_ time. I can't let this continue, if it happens a again there is no guarantee I won't tell her." I pulled my Aunt inside the bathroom my plumbing was ruined anyway by these dwarves. I went getting the extra bottle of sleeping draught and bandages wrapping her now treated wounds with care. I had some basic medical expertise treating wounds.

"Thank you,"

"Get some professional help for that." I snapped at her my tone none too polite.

"Okay..." She trailed off breathing normally now. Coming back to reality now, it seems she's come out of it for the moment. What worries me the most is both her parents has seizures and she might have one eventually. I don't know anymore with family you must tread lightly or risk a scandal of some sort. With Lobelia she'll turn it into one.

I sent her off after a few minutes afterwards after scolding her harshly in hobbitish, so the Dwarrows inside wouldn't know what I said to her. After that she left, I sighed sometimes it hurt to help her but it broke my heart to see her like this. She used to smile and laugh more but now less so. Closing the door behind as she walked down Bag Shot row.

"I feel like I need some hard Liquor," I said after a song that led to my dishes being tossed around. 

  
A series of exceptionally loud knocks to my door came to my ears I resisted the urge to flick my ears backwards just slightly. It was a strong urge. I won out as usual.

"He's here."  Gandalf said quietly. I didn't care who 'he' was as long as he wasn't going to send me to kill his wife I didn't care. _Unlikely with twelve followers and a wizard around this is something bigger._ The ninja analytic side of me stated. I opened the door.

"Wow," I hadn't expected the blue eyed dwarrow at my doorstep.

_Yavanna save me, he is drop dead gorgeous._ I thought my eyes were dreamy. Probably with a weird smile plastered on my face too, why the heck not? Just toss away my damn emotional control why don't ya?

_'He's like a hot black haired fox.'_

"Are you flirting?" Gandalf was wide eyed and very surprised.

"Did I say that out loud?" I asked stunned.

"Yeah ye kind'a did."Balin stated.

"Gandalf you said this place would be easy to find I got lost. Twice." The black haired foxy leader said to Gandalf stepping inside my smial. 

"Let me guess, got chased by three evil hounds that are as mean as they sound?" I guess judging by the state of his cloak I guessed that one of the  hounds bit into it, leaving behind teeth marks in it. With a long tear when the mutt was shaken off his cloak. Their leader did a double take when I said that surprised by my sudden skill. 

"How'd you know that?"He asked me eyeing me suspiciously. 

 " You got attacked by Farmer Maggots dogs, he isn't so friendly if you try to steal his crops. All the Fauntlings do it til they get caught." I stated my voice was uncertain.

"So this is the Hobbit?" he looked me up and down like a slab of meat. I am not a pork chop!

"I thought you said we were looking for a Mister Baggins? This Hobbit is obviously a lass." Thorin growled at Gandalf. Dwarves! The nerve that's like saying I'm not good for anything except being the 'stupid obedient little bird of a wife', 'nothing but a house wife', and 'completely unable to make choices without her husbands approval or say so'. I didn't realize I was shaking in a cold fury this _dwarf_ I'm tempted to kill him but then I would have to kill all of them. That might not bode well for my conscience or relationships with other dwarves. 

"Well ...I ...er..."Gandalf stammered. He obviously wanted my brother, if he wasn't a wizard I would have throttled him or at least attempted to. He's taller than me by a long shot, so it might have mixed effects. Or might not just work, period. End of story and sentence. So it would have been a fail. 

"What is your weapon of choice axe or sword?" He asked me his eyes were guarded I kept my own masked in neutrality hiding my unadultered pure seething fury.

"Chain scythes, and throwing stars maybe even a cast iron skillet." I said. 

"Oh by the way drop your attitude or I'll shove your sword up your ass."I grumbled in hobbitish, grinning inside my head doing joyous happy dance inside my head knowing that he had no idea that I intended on doing that or humiliating him next time he opened that big mouth of his when I'm hungry.

"Never heard of either of those first two." He said there was doubt in his eyes, he thought I was bullshitting him. Confusion too 

"Figures."I muttered under my breath.

"She looks more like a barmaid than a burglar." He said gruffly dismissing my own existence. _The last person to tell me that was my Ex and I haven't talked to him since he destroyed my door! Defiling it with graffiti in hobbitish! The little bastard had his feet shaved while he slept by me for that, break up was cruel and very harsh. The only time I truly unleashed swear words in the common tongue freely. Lobelia heard about it and boxed him in the ears for good measure._ He made my blood boil right there he just _**had to**_ open up his big mouth didn't he? He never thought it through. He probably should have. 

I opened my mothers glory box and pulled out the dented beyond repair cast iron skillet I oft used on Lotho Sackville-Baggins, like early this morning when he was peeping in on me while I was naked. In my own bedroom! While getting dressed.

"I. AM. NO. BARMAID." I managed to choke out. They probably thought I sounded like I was going to cry and ignored me for the moment, while I was seething with rage inwardly and possibly outwardly. Lotho used that type of tone on me all the time dismissive like I didn't matter I mattered a lot more than he did right now. I hated him for it as he always was dismissive of my status as both a ninja and a Hobbit of Bag End.

Probably because he was too young to understand Chauvinism would make his life hellish with women making it so because of it which is why he hasn't exactly courted yet. He didn't love me he loved my home more, typical Hobbit male cares more for the possessions instead of the actual female and how they may feel. The view was amazing during the sunsets after all and the wealth from my inheritance would be enough for him never to work again a day in his life. I refused every attempt to get me married to _him_  I told him I would sooner marry a werewolf than I would him. He not knowing what that I was, I told him that I would also would rather marry a wolf than him at least _they are_ civil to a point and less like a barbarian like himself. He went home crying like a baby. Somehow that was amusing because it was just Lotho.

I held onto the pan's handle and he was stopped mid sentence talking to Balin when the pan was thrown squarely at the back of his head, because I couldn't swing at him, he was too tall for me to reach his head anyway's.

"Nobody talks to me like that, ever again or you will face more than just a cast iron skillet to the skull." I snarled the room went deathly silent my face was red I knew it.

"Troll." I snapped walking around the still form of the handsome dwarf, for now he was just unconscious he was still breathing for now at least. I managed to get something else started from my other stores, having three large pantries helped. I had something to eat which eased my already clouding head.

I set to work preparing some stew from venison and varied vegetables ,while he was unconscious getting a few shocked looks myself. I heard a slight noise one I recognized Lotho was coming through the secret tunnels again. I got up just as Thorin woke up getting my best chain scythes out from the mount on the wall of my bedroom just as a thud was heard down the maze of passages.

"Lotho!!!!!!!" I roared furiously.

"Hey!" Lotho yelled. 

"You stupid Hobbit! OUT! OUT !!!"I roared.

"But...."He gave me the puppy dog eyes. I knew better I was old enough to know better than to fall so easily for his tricks.

"OUUUUTTTTTTTT!!!" I roared louder this time, loud enough for it to echo throughout my home likely my neighbors heard it too.

She was seen dragging the hobbit across the floor with what they guessed was a chain scythe, his legs tied up at one end scythe in front of his legs just under the knee caps. The other end over her shoulder as she pulled him by this end surprisingly with ease even over carpeted flooring. Opening the door as he struggled to get away while she stopped to open the door.

Opening it wide when she untied him grabbing him by the scruff of his shirt she threw him out. Slamming the door taking out a box of nails and  hobbit sized hammer and going over to somewhere in her home, banging nails into the secret entrance trapdoor so he can't get in.

"Who was that?"Nori asked. 

"Lotho."I spat. I was already in a worse mood now than I was after I spoke to his mother about his behavior being unacceptable. 

"I'm guessing you don't like him?" Fili said. He was right on the dot with that.

"That's being nice." She growled.

"You threw a cast iron skillet at my head halfling!" Thorin was incredulous at that. 

"Because your too tall, dwarf-ling!" I retorted sharply adding the -ling part because well I don't know! Give him a taste of his own medicine? His eyes widened at that biting insult, he wasn't expecting her to know what children of dwarves are called.

"Both of you stop!" Bofur shouted.

"Shut up." She snarled at Bofur.

Her ears flicked again straining to hear any sort of movement in the tunnels below just in case. I had put a large rock over the trap door just in case. I had a oncoming head ache and now I **_needed_** a drink. I got out the hard Wild berry wine that is at least a hundred years old and I had gotten from Old Took's old stores on his birthday. Filling my own flaggon taking seat in my fathers reading chair. 

"The stew is good." Thorin noted quietly enjoying it.

"She even has dessert!" Fíli shouted joyously.

I downed my drink before getting some more, filling it half way. Knowing I wouldn't be able to drink any more than that without making fool of myself, which I obviously already have.    

  They showed me the contract soon after I read it unconcerned about the fact, I might die with Lotho stalking me and peeping on me was enough to fray my nerves. He isn't even thirty three! He's about 21.

"Think furnace with wings." Bofur offered I looked at him with a bored expression. It was unnerving. 

"Sounds like the dragon might get along with Lobelia or be terrified by her."I chuckled. That turned into laughter. 

"Your not taking this seriously enough," Gloin snapped.

"Why should I? I'm thirty four I'm not exactly fifty."I countered, in reality I could use a meaningful contract anyways. Even if I was retired, I retired early. Very early on in the field. 

"You really aren't concerned about this?"Dori's voice cracked. I set down the contract I hadn't finished reading in my lap. 

"I had no intention on living long with my luck." I told him callously.

"Really I will be the one to tell your ..." Thorin began. 

"Tell my mother what?!!! That Lotho hasn't left me alone in the past three months and that I'm more than willing to leave, because I know he won't follow?" I shrieked.

"Don't you dare. Next time I will tell Old Took." I knew that look on Gandalf's face he was going to tell.

They sung Misty Mountain's Cold she could say that it quickly became her favorite dwarven song. 

She signed the Contract without hesitation she didn't even faint when Bofur and Fíli made it worse about the dragon. She offered them rooms and slept in the chair despite Thorin protesting that "He'll sleep in the chair". She won out and told him off for being a 'bullheaded gentledwarf which is sweet but meaningless'. She proved that it didn't matter what Thorin said she was packed already, managing to pack even her handkerchiefs and her weapons.Odd it may be she didn't really care. 

She woke up before anyone else she had Hamfast restock her pantry temporarily, she baked and cooked enough to feed an army just before dawn, everyone expected to get rations this morning they were wrong.

"Wow,"Fili jaws dropped at the breakfast laid out on the same table. 

"Someone's been busy."Bofur teased. 

"Hearty first breakfast, the last one I may eat in the Shire for a while." I said calmly.

"How many meals do Shire-folk eat?" Bombur asked curiously.

"Seven, we snack a lot in between." I explained. Thorin and the rest of the dwarves looked at her funny she snickered at their reaction to that revelation.

They ate in relative joy they took notice that she had left to settle her assets she returned soon after taking a blueberry muffin, toast, and bacon scarfing them down.

"Are you sure about going lass its not too late..." Bombur began.

"You don't have a home let me help you reclaim it,"

"...It could be dangerous." Kili countered.

"Life is full of danger," I continued.

"Really I couldn't tell considering your forge is abandoned and you are unarmed and relatively  peaceful." Fili teased smugly. Like a cute smug fluffy puppy.

"We love a good party under the party tree." I laughed.

 

First night outside of the shire she was asked to sing something by the Company:

"Under the sun and moon

here the party tree stands

 full of fun

here lies our party

never ending 

 

 

our love true

our beloved party  tree

never fails to amaze

the festivals lie under it

lit by lantern and branched holding streamers

the sky alight with fireworks

 

see the great party 

song, dance

and general mischief

as the festival never ending

laughter rising into the night  
lets hope that this night

lasts forever."

I sang sweetly thinking of the party tree.

"Beautiful." Gloin said dreamily.

"Gloin aren't you married?" I asked him.

"Yes....why?" he asked.

"I'm guessing you don't have ...never mind then." I shied away from him.

"Don't have what?" Gloin pressed. 

"Mates for life..." I said calmly.

"My parents were like that, sometimes it doesn't work out..." I left and turned in early dreaming of the party tree. It was too soon to be talking about my parents I realized that it will go away with time. Shagging a few Hobbits here and there won't make the pain go away even if I never had any illegitimate kids by them and they weren't exactly the best people.

"Bella..."

"Bells?"

"Bella..."

Someone brushed a hand on my ear.

I woke up bolt upright shivering not realizing it was Thorin, he was concerned about me. He was the one who woke me up, he had the first watch that night. His brows furrowed together in concern honestly I didn't expect that.

"You were crying..." He began.

"I was?" I was in a daze.

"Please don't cry..." He told me. Brushing away the wet tears on my cheeks.

She fell asleep in Thorin Oakenshield's arms.

 

 

 

 

   

 

 

 

   

**Author's Note:**

> I own Nothing!  
> Bell is really stressed out by Lotho's incessant peeping and breaking into her Smial.  
> r&r, comment the like tell me what you think and what i can do to make this better. I'm terrible at doing accents tell me what I'm doing wrong and I'll try to fix it I swear. I got better then I got out of practice, if that makes sense.
> 
> I added details to my recent headcanon so I can keep this in somewhat neat line inside my head. I think it adds character though I might be overdoing it or over thinking. I like keeping headcanon the more I do keep to it the less confused I get.


End file.
